A Foster Christmas
by fbipandagirl
Summary: A domestic Destiel AU where Cas is human and grew up in foster families, prompting him and Dean to foster two kids of their own. This is about their first Christmas spent as a family.


"Dad! Dad! Get up! Get up!"

Cas grumbled and rolled over, burying his face farther into the covers.

"Come on, Cas. You heard your daughter!" Dean jumped onto the bed, causing Cas to bounce up high into the air. He groaned and opened his eyes to see stubble and emerald orbs inches from his face. "It's Christmas!"

Dean yanked the covers off of him and darted out of the room before he could get a punch in. Cas was not a morning person and Dean knew that; he enjoyed exploiting his mood. Joanne, their daughter, wasn't much better. She ran out of the room alongside her father, laughing all the way.

It wasn't just because it was morning. Cas had been trying to prepare himself for this day all year but to no avail. He really wasn't looking forward to this. As Dean's voice trailed down the hallway, he slowly tore himself from their bed and headed towards the kitchen. He couldn't stop the growing knot in his stomach, no matter how hard he tried. Jo and Dean's happiness meant more to him than anything in the world, but he was ashamed to say that his hatred for Christmas topped even that at the moment.

Cas tried to contain the shudder that ran through him as he entered the kitchen and started up the coffee pot. This happened every time. Each year he would wake up to people cheering for a holiday that the entire world found joyous and had to pretend he felt the same. Nothing bothered him more than the memories of what Christmas in his household used to be. Well, there wasn't much household to it. Bouncing from foster home to foster home, he never had a consistent family for a whole year, so he never got to celebrate the holiday with anyone who even remotely acted like they cared about him. He was always being tossed from one place to the next; no family wanted him. It got to the point that just the words, "social worker" gave him a panic attack, even if they were mentioned off-handedly. For him, Christmas always meant loneliness and envy and heartbreak. He didn't even think Dean would be able to change that.

The coffee maker beeped, signaling its completion and Cas reached for a mug. After pouring his coffee and adding some sugar, he turned and nearly spilled his drink all over his son who had unexpectedly walked up behind him.

"Oh, sorry Robert."

His son just looked at him, a sullen glaze over his eyes. Robert pushed the messy hair from his face and silently poured himself a cup of coffee, leaving out any sugar or cream. Cas leaned against the counter, trying to look casual. He ignored the knot in his stomach as he forced himself to take a sip of his drink.

"So, what were you up to last night?" He meant it nonchalantly, but Robert glared at him anyway.

"None of your business!" The teenager stormed out of the room before Cas could say anything else.

"I'll never get used to this parent thing," Cas sighed as he closed his eyes. Dean was such a natural with their kids. Sure, neither of them got along with Robert, but Jo was a different story. She and Dean bonded almost instantly. Cas rubbed his eyes. They'd only been fostering Joanne and Robert since the beginning of the year, so he could equate a lot of his awkwardness with the time frame, but that didn't explain how it was so easy for Dean. Shaking his head, Cas poured out his full mug; his stomach was twisting too much to accept it. He had never talked with Dean about his issues with Christmas, so he couldn't let him see his panic. Maybe after the holidays he would bring it up. Cas did love him, after all.

Steeling himself for his entrance into the living room did no good. He felt his heart start to race as soon as he saw the Christmas tree twinkling like it had its own stars. There were carols playing softly on the radio, tugging at his insides; not the way they were supposed to, though. He flinched as someone grabbed his hand.

"What's wrong, dad?" Some of the knots undid themselves at the sound of Jo's voice. Cas looked down to see her dark eyes focused on him, filled with genuine concern. The fact that she called him "dad" caught him off guard.

"Oh, uh-"

"He's just not a morning person, sweetie." Dean winked subtlety at him. "That's all."

Cas nodded, which seemed to satisfy Jo. She bounced over to the tree and started sorting through the presents, putting them into four neat piles. As Cas watched her with slight confusion, Dean walked over and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"For real, though. Are you alright, Cas?" Cas turned and met Dean's gaze. He nearly crumbled. "You look a little freaked."

Cas cleared his throat and nodded again. "Yeah, I'm fine. Really. Just not awake, like you said."

Something shifted behind Dean's eyes that showed he didn't believe him, but instead of pushing the issue, he squeezed his shoulder before walking over to the presents.

As Cas sat down on the couch, Robert came huffing into the room with his cup of coffee. Dean looked up as he sank into the armchair.  
"Well good morning to you too, sunshine."

Robert sneered over his mug.

"You and I are having a talk later" He pointed a finger at Robert the same way he did to Sam. Cas smirked. "You can tell me all about that party you snuck out to last night."

"Whatever."

Cas' hands were sweating by the time that Dean gave him his present. He felt awkward as he looked at the box wrapped in red paper with little green elves on it. He wasn't used to getting gifts; much less from people who cared about him. Caring. Family. Fostering. Loneliness. His heart rate picked back up and his fingers twitched as he started undoing the paper. Dean sat down beside him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. He rubbed his arm as the last bit of paper fell away.

"Hope you like it." Dean smiled. Cas' mouth dropped open as he saw a photo album laying in his lap. There was a picture of the four of them at Disney on the cover.

"I know it's cheesy," Dean continued. "But I figured you'd enjoy having something physical to remember this year by."

Cas silently flipped through the pages, seeing pictures from trips they had taken together, parties they had and even random activities around the house.

"How did you find the time to take all of these?" He asked, turning to Dean. His boyfriend smiled.

"Sammy had these high-tech glasses or something that could take pictures if I just thought of the word, 'picture'." Cas' eyes widened and Dean laughed. "Nah, I'm just kidding." He reached into his pocket, pulling out his phone. "This baby took them all."

"He also forced me to take some." Robert looked up from his coffee. "The ones with you both of you, at least."

"I /might/ have taken one or two myself as well," Jo added, smiling from the floor.

Cas felt a lump form in his throat that had nothing to do with nerves. Seeing everyone he cared about sitting around him made him forget all about his past for a few moments. As he flipped to the last page of the album, he found a small envelope with his name on it. Curious, he pulled it out and opened it up, revealing several pages with handwriting on them.

"Gabriel told me about your aversion to Christmas." Cas snapped up to look at Dean. His boyfriend's eyes were soft. "He kept it vague so I don't know any details, but I know it has something to do with your foster past," Cas' eyes began to blur as Dean squeezed his shoulder. "This letter is just to assure you of how much I care about you, despite your 'emotional issues'. Your past doesn't matter to me…hell, you know what mine is like. I love you and that's all that matters."

Cas nuzzled his face into Dean's neck before any tears could fall. He breathed in the smell of gunpowder and scotch that was so familiar to him and started to relax.

"I love you," he whispered into Dean's shirt. Dean rubbed his arm and kissed the top of his head.

"I love you, too."

The room was peacefully silent for a few minutes, so Cas was surprised to hear Robert speak up.

"Merry Christmas….dad."

Cas looked up and saw him smiling slightly. He smiled himself.

"Merry Christmas, you guys." He turned to Dean and kissed him on the lips. "Merry Christmas."


End file.
